Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Respect? Yes!


So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Ephesians 5:33 (NLT)

Do you ever feel deja vu in the middle of an argument with your dearly beloved? Are you walking on eggshells afraid to further inflame the situation? Are you tired of rehashing the same old thing and seeming to get no response or relief? I have been married a total of almost 29 years and thought that I had read every Christian book on marriage. However, last week I discovered a new one that I highly recommend, Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs by Emerson Eggerichs. Dr. Eggerichs description of a typical argument, calling it the "Crazy Cycle," is right on. But he goes further and explains how we can get out of it and move on to become a truly energized couple without all the craziness. The "aha" moment came for me as he explained that the cycle will be broken when I show respect for my husband. Most of us are very familiar with the idea of love in a marriage, but respect? Paul is very specific in his writing stating that the husband is to love and the wife is to respect. Why? Because God knows that He needs to remind us to do what is not natural for us to do. Men and women are so different—in fact, that is one of the subjects I want to discuss when I debrief with God in heaven. The author helps me to see through my pink sunglasses and hear with my pink hearing aids, that Mark wears blue, only blue. We don't approach life the same way at all but who would want to be married to your clone? I have discovered that a simple change of attitude and approach works wonders in my marriage. Let me know if you have any thoughts.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Truly Free


So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free. John 8:36 (NHT)

I am on sensory and spiritual overload having returned last night from an Amazing Freedom, Women of Faith Conference. We were all ages, stages, sizes, and shapes sharing together in laughter and tears. And to top it off, I had the privilege of listening and watching Beth Moore – live – at the pre-conference. Now that is one highly caffeinated woman! In explaining her use of toilet paper as a filter for her coffee pot in her hotel room, she said, "I drink coffee in the morning to calm down!" Amen!!! (Don't ask me why she couldn't use a regular filter.) This was a first for me so if you have never attended one of these conferences, be sure and check it out for next year. I laughed until my sides ached listening to Anita Renfrow while at other times, tears rolled down my cheeks as I listened to the stories of pain and triumph shared by several of the speakers. I ended up using a lot of Kleenex. God was in that place along with 11,000 women and we all left rejoicing that our Heavenly Father has given us amazing freedom to know Him, to walk in the way He leads, and to be one of the many daughters of His Kingdom. I wondered why we did not have paper to take notes but I quickly discovered why. It was all I could do to just take it in. A whole new run begins next February with the theme of Infinite Grace. Be sure and put it on your To-do list and take a girlfriend…or a whole bunch.

Friday, January 25, 2008

A Weak Hand


God arms me with strength, and he makes my way perfect. Psalm 18:32 (NLT)

My hand is so much better—I can even do my own hair. But I have no strength in it or the left hand, which has always been weaker. As a result, I cannot open bottles or jars, pry off lids (I managed to spill a whole container of parmesan cheese,) use a knife or scissors, or button my jeans if they are freshly laundered. That list seems pretty minor until you are the one who has to ask for help for even the simplest task just like my three-year-old granddaughter. My weak hand will grow stronger as my body heals and some added exercise. But there have also been times when my spirit suffered from weakness with feelings of inadequacy or failure. I have been known to barrel my way through a tough situation only to find complete disaster on the other side. I did it my way and suffered the consequences. Each day offers a choice of doing it God's way or heading down my own path. This crossroad is where the spiritual exercise comes into play as I learn to step out in faith. I am so grateful that God promises to arm me with strength. I don't have to stress over which way to take, because He will smooth out the way for me. And the final outcome will be perfect.

LORD, Your strength is made perfect in weakness. Thank you that I can trust you with impossible situations.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

A Foolish Request


Then the mother of James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to Jesus with her sons. She knelt respectfully to ask a favor. "What is your request?" he asked. She replied, "In your Kingdom, please let my two sons sit in places of honor next to you, one on your right and the other on your left." Matthew 20:20-21 (NLT)

As mothers, God gives us great influence on our children. From their earliest moments of life, they are completely dependant on us. In fact, our task is to raise these precious little ones to mature young adults with complete independence from us as, ready to be productive on their own. I love that little saying, "We are to give our children roots and wings." I also read, "Give them roots to keep them grounded through tough times. Give them wings to soar above everything, explore new worlds, and fly farther than we ever did." As much as we might agree with this goal, it is easy to get sidetracked on our own motherly agenda and timetable for both. Notice the mother mentioned in the reading for today. She was really going out on a limb for her two sons with a special request of Jesus. Now, these were grown men—not young boys. My question is why was she involved? Why was she even there? Was she there to fight for their just reward? These two men were part of the band of disciples that were called by Jesus to work by his side during His earthly ministry. Jesus answered her question but their response indicated that they were still clueless. I am not so bothered by the men's reckless answer because Jesus would straighten them out. But what was the mother thinking? This is a good reminder that our children are on loan to us. Over the years in our care, we nurture them, teach them, discipline them, and of course, love them. Then we let them go. I know I will always be my kids' greatest cheerleader, but I no longer control the game.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Wild Ride


It was a beautiful day for a trip. Our vacation with the kids and three grandgirlies had been wonderful and now we were all off to visit Granddad in Pasadena. We figured it would take about six hours to drive from the Bay Area to Southern California. As the hours passed, disgruntled voices from the back of the van could be heard. "She's glaring at me!" "Her stuff is on my side!" "That's mine!" "Are we there yet?" "I'm hungry!" The close confines of a car seat, long hours on the road, and boredom created the perfect environment for frayed tempers and harsh words that filtered up to the front. Those little girls were just about done. It reminds me of the story I have been reading about the children of Israel and their journey in the wilderness to the Promised Land. "We don't have any food!" "There is no water!" "I don't like this food, I want meat!" "Why did we ever leave Egypt?" They complained, whined, argued, bickered, and pouted just like any group of children. Moses, their leader, constantly reprimanded them for their stubbornness and disobedience. Yet, God was there each step of the way and patiently supplied them with what they needed. He provided manna each morning for them to eat. He poured water out of a rock in the middle of the desert. Quail, too numerous to count, fell to the ground for them to roast. Their shoes never wore out (as a shoe person, this caught my attention). Time and again they whimpered about their missing comforts. Their memories were so short that going back to Egypt as slaves seemed like a better alternative. How often do we mistake the past as the best time in our lives? Even when God promised them a land flowing with milk and honey, prosperity, long life, and health, they just could not seem to wrap their minds around it and their hearts were too stubborn to listen.

"Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live! You can make this choice by loving the Lord your God, obeying him, and committing yourself firmly to him. This is the key to your life. And if you love and obey the Lord, you will live long in the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob." Deuteronomy 30:19-20 (NLT)


Are you struggling with a choice today? Are you willing to trust God for the next step or do you want to go back to the familiar? We can't keep wandering in our own desert and assume that He will solve our current crisis if all we do is whine and complain. God's offer far exceeds our expectations but we have to choose it over the fading glitz of today or yesterday. Don't look back, but be bold and step out—taking hold of the promise of life that only He can give. Commit your life to Him and be ready for a wild ride—that is the key to life!

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Just Sit


Abraham never wavered in believing God's promise. In fact, his faith grew stronger, and in this he brought glory to God. He was fully convinced that God is able to do whatever he promises. And because of Abraham's faith, God counted him as righteous. Romans 4:20-22 (NLT)

Things are looking up. Surgery on my hand went as expected this week and I am currently pecking this out with one hand. I even did my own make-up this morning. It is amazing how you can learn to compensate with your fingers when the thumb is out of commission. Now hair is a whole different story! It has been hard for me to sit around and let my hand heal once the pain was under control. I have found there are times in my life that I just have to sit and let God handle it. The hard part for me is to not try and help. Abraham's story would have never been accomplished if he had not believed that God was able to do the impossible. So during this time of waiting—whether it is for healing, a new job, or a move—He is working behind the scenes. Hang in there!

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Trials yet Joy


My friend, Zoƫ Elmore, included in one of her devotions a poem that really struck a nerve with me. Her statement, "We grow spiritually only from and through the trials that arrive on our doorstep," echoed my prayer this morning. There are still some unresolved issues that are keeping me (and members of my family) on edge to see what God is going to do. But the best part is that we KNOW He has it under control. Enjoy!


It's sometimes very difficult

for us to understand

the wisdom and the love behind

the things that God has planned.


But we wouldn't have the rainbow

If we didn't have the rain;

We wouldn't know the pleasure

If we never tasted pain.


We wouldn't love the sunrise

If we hadn't felt the night;

And we wouldn't know our weakness

If we hadn't sensed God's might.


We couldn't have the springtime

or the yellow daffodil

if we hadn't experienced

the winter's frosty chill.


And though the brilliant sunshine

is something God has made.

He knew too much could parch our souls

so He created shade.


So God's given us a balance:

Enough joys to keep us glad,

Enough tears to keep us humble,

Enough good to balance bad.


And if you'll trust in Him you'll see

Though yesterday brought sorrow,

The clouds will part and dawn will bring

A happier tomorrow.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Me? Adjust?!

I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid. John 14:27 (NLT)

When I was in the fifth grade, I fell and broke my right arm. For six weeks I had to do all my schoolwork orally since I could not write. Good thing I can spell! The inconvenience of those weeks is only a vague memory because 50 years erases so much. Next week I am having surgery on my right hand due to some degenerative arthritis in the area above the thumb. I will be in a heavy bandage for a week and then a removable brace for another 6 weeks. For the proper healing, I won't be able to do the pinching movement with my right thumb. Think what that means. I am tired of the pain so the surgery is my choice, but not being able to do even the simplest of chores looms as a real problem. How am I going to do my hair? Make-up? Dress? Eat? Write? Computer? Drive? You know…those important things in life. I believe the loss of my independence is what I dread the most because I am a pretty independent person. My dear husband has cheerfully announced that he will take care of me. I know that he will be there but he has a life, too, and I am going to feel pretty silly asking for help all the time. It is going to take a lot of patience on both of our parts to endure the next few weeks. The normal expectations for living will need to be put aside for a bit in order to not spend the whole time frustrated. I am going to have to learn to adjust which is probably a very good lesson. Independence, control, patience, frustration…all these words go together when we decide we are in charge of our world. But what does God say? He gives us peace of mind and heart because He is in control. In fact, we can't get it any other way. OK – no more fretting. I'll let you know how it goes.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Guidebook

Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another—showing us truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God's way. Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 (The Message)

Mission accomplished. My commitment 365 days ago to read through the Bible is complete. How easy it is to make resolutions on January 1st but find that after a few days, the determination has been replaced with complacency. This year, I prayed that God would help me get over that hump and meet me with fresh insights that would draw me back daily. And He did. What did I learn? My life has been challenged as I read the stories of the patriarchs, the kings, the prophets, the women, the disciples and of course, the life of Jesus…each one mirroring some aspect of my life that needed laser vision to make the needed changes. I found comfort and encouragement during various trials and frustrations. I was riveted as I read of His continued love for His people, the Jews, and the great lengths that He went to restore them to Himself even as they continually strayed from Him. In fact, the whole book is the story of His love and how we may experience it by faith in Jesus. We bring on so much of the trouble in our lives by the choices we make; yet, time after time, He forgives us when we call on Him and turn from our sin and selfishness. He is always there with mercy and grace willing to give us the nudge we need to get us going in the right direction. And He is there to equip us for the tasks He gives us to do. And how do we know which way to go? By reading His word. It is a circle…a circle of love that surrounds us with what we need if we spend time with Him. New year—new challenge! Make a daily date with God and see what He has to say to YOU. Let me know how it is going…I will be praying for you.